Oh, I've never thought of anything like that.
I don't know what it feels like to be like that.
I've been in this public school system for about 5-6 years, but when I was new I was this innocent girl who didn't know she was being judged.
Now that I look back I really was an interesting girl...
But I talked to a lot of people and even though I didn't have many friends (we were really just weird) I still had friends.
I do remember not having any friends at one point though. This one girl who I thought was my best friend, one day just told me she was only friends with me because I'm smart.
I was too young to understand what that meant. I thought she thought of me as smart, and so we stayed "friends." I'd follow her around everywhere while she found new friends, and I remember sitting alone on the playground mulch, and trying to join new groups but losing interest quickly, and my "friend" was trying to get rid of me. I remember sitting by myself and the popular boys making fun of my hello kitty velcro shoes which my grandparents bought me. (which I quickly ditched afterwards because of that) After 2nd grade was over, I was so...confused. I didn't understand what was happening.
Until 3rd grade happened and I met a few nice girls. We were all a bit different, but we seemed to get along except for the occasional fight. I didn't really get to know them until I sat myself down and joined with them and had a few playdates.
So, my advice: I know you guys aren't in 2nd grade, but now that I look back I wonder why I wasn't in pain. Just keep staying positive and remaining true to your personality, and join a group that looks fun even though they're all BFFs. Me and my past BFF (she moved) had this new girl join us and we were all 3 BFFs. At first I didn't like her but then I realized she was really nice and funny and I didn't know that about her before. Maybe you guys are really quiet, so no one knows what you're really like. Just express yourself, let people know your interests, crack a few jokes, or volunteer to help someone.
Me and that girl are now not friends, but we're still nice to each other. She has her own friend group and I have mine, and it's still okay to mix up once in a while.
And I guess last year, after my best friend moved, I was a little alone. We were part of a squad but we were sort of mostly just geeking out on weird minecraft videos separate from them, and when she left, I started making conversation with them and now we're close friends! You can always join a squad, don't make it seem like you can't just join. Now I haven't kept in touch with my ex best friend, but apparently she's popular and a lot of guys like her in her new school... anyway we aren't close anymore buttt this isn't my point so
Right now I'm also having a sort of friend crisis. My friend is nice, but has a really short temper, and when she gets mad, she gets really mad and it's frightening sometimes to be around her..
She's only hurt me once, but I'm still a little shaky around her.
But it's better having no friends then a friend that hurts you.
But you should still have friends. Do you guys have any talents?
You could stand out or maybe crack a joke in class.
Wow, I wrote a lot...